theblackmorals: (Uta 100 x 100)
Chapter one - introduction

Bands: 12012.
Characters: Tooru, Hiroaki, Wataru and mentions of others.
Rating: NC-17.
Genre/type: Canon, adultfic, (long) vignette, darkfic, angstfic.
Warnings: WAFF, yaoi/homosexuality/slash, fluff, NC17, attempts at humour, lemon/explicit sex, mature themes (OBS: implied only, never mentioned or described in details), consensual, hurt/comfort, love/hate, sexual situations, angst.

Information about Tooru here.
Information about Hiroaki here.
Information about 12012 here.
'Strange Relationship' archive page here.

Relative time in play: The very beginning of 12012, a few months after they formed in 2003.
Relations: Not related to any other plays of mine.

Summary: Tooru had done it a million times before; he had given his heart to someone who didn’t or couldn’t return his feelings, and he had been hurt and beaten down, sometimes even physically too. This time however, he had really made a mess of himself; he had not only fallen in love with someone who didn’t return his feelings, but also someone who seemed to downright hate his guts. Tooru couldn’t win... No matter what he did he just couldn’t win...


Tooru walked slowly down the decorative corridors with his heart caught in his throat, and the palms of his hands were sweaty to the point where they felt downright disgusting. He continuously dried them off in the denim fabric of his pants, but they kept being sweaty all the same, and in the end he just gave up and let them be, stuffing them in his pockets instead.

It just couldn’t be helped; he was always like this when he was nervous; always sweating, his heart galloping away with a million miles per hour, his limbs shaking, and right now… well, it would be an overstatement to say he had never been more nervous in his entire life, because surely he had, and yet… he couldn’t seem to remember the last time it had ever been this bad before…

‘The worst thing that can happen is that he turns me down… Gods know I’ve tried that before…’ he thought to himself. It didn’t help.

“Wataru?” Tooru called softly as he knocked on the door; three knocks, soft, sweet and coy. When the door didn’t open right away though, he tried again, knocking three times more, though slightly harder this time, and when he finally heard movement behind the door, from somewhere deep within the hotel room, he took a step back and tried to put on his best, most charming smile - it turned out slightly queasy more than anything else though.

‘I just have to get it over with… I just have to tell him and see how it goes…’

When Wataru finally opened the door he was wearing nothing but a loose bathrobe, and Tooru instantly felt his pristine face heat up; a pretty tint of pink dusting over his round cheeks. The speech he had rehearsed all night seemed to disappear into thin air - along with his ability to talk at all - and his mouth opened and closed a couple of times, though no sounds pushed over his lips as he stared at the half-naked vocalist who looked like he had just been sleeping.

‘He’s naked…’

“What is it, Tooru?” Wataru asked when Tooru proceeded to stand there gaping like an idiot while desperately trying to keep his eyes from wandering down the bathrobe that was barely held together by the belt loosely tied around Wataru’s slim waist - though of course it was like trying not to think of an elephant, and he couldn’t help himself; his dark eyes shifted up and down the other man’s body as he stood fiddling in embarrassment.  

‘Why is he naked?’

‘He looks so good naked…’

‘With no makeup and his hair all in disarray…’

'Probably what he's look like after we---'

“Tooru? Did you want something?” the vocalist tried again and he reached out, probably to touch Tooru’s shoulder in an attempt to nudge him into motion, though that only caused the bathrobe to shift on his body, the hem of it falling more open; exposing more of his smooth, milky chest. The small drummer jumped nervously before he could even touch him though, and Wataru redrew his hand instantly with a confused smile.

“N-no, I just… I-I just wanted to…” Tooru trailed off as his face heated up even more, to the point where the burning of his cheeks almost physically hurt, and he shook his head softly, making his long, dark-brown hair fall down in front of his eyes, “I just wanted to ask you something…”

“Ask me what, Tooru?” Wataru asked softly, patiently, seemingly not at all annoyed by the fact that he had been woken up in the middle of the night by a blabbering idiot who couldn’t seem to cut to the chase so he could go back to sleep.

‘He’s always so kind to me…’

Tooru was the only member of 12012 who had joined the band without having a previous friendship with any of his band mates. They all knew each other some way or another - Wataru and Hiroaki had even been childhood friends - and… Tooru felt like an outsider. He had a nagging feeling that the others were tentative around him, like they didn’t really accept him as part of their band, and they always seemed impatient with him. Feeling this way, the young drummer stuttered a lot, and he was always fiddling and blushing, always being clumsy and stupid around them - he was normally like that too, truth be told, but more so now that he felt uncomfortable, and unwanted, in the others’ midst.

Only Wataru had made him feel like less of a nuisance. Wataru was sweet and soft-spoken, and he never rushed Tooru like the others did, or rolled his eyes at him when he started fiddling and blushing and… Tooru liked him... Like, liked him liked him... Although they had only known each other for a few months now the drummer wanted to confess that to him; he wanted to tell Wataru how he felt, and he hoped the other man would return his feelings.

Maybe they could even become lovers someday…

If Wataru was even gay, that was…

Tooru raised his eyes determinedly, to look at Wataru’s handsome face, after a few moments of fiddling and studying his feet like a cutesy little school girl. “I wanted to…” he began softly, though he trailed off again as something caught his eyes, and he peered curiously over the smaller man’s shoulder at the bed placed in the end of Wataru’s hotel room. Upon it laid a man – a boy – naked, sleeping, wrapped up in the white sheets. He didn’t look a day over fifteen, and he didn’t look like all he had done on the bed that night was sleeping.


Wataru followed Tooru’s eyes cluelessly, before turning back to him with a slightly embarrassed look on his gentle face – the ‘ooups I forgot I had a boy toy stuffed away on my bed’-look. Before he could say anything though, the young drummer pushed away with a weird expression on his face, and turned on his heels to run off, hurrying down the corridor towards the stairway.


With his heart beating in his ears Tooru ran the three flight of stairs to his own floor and - though Wataru clearly wasn’t following him - he didn’t stop running until he stood inside his own hotel room, the door securely closed and locked behind him.

Tears flooded his angelic face, and he knew Wataru had seen them too.

‘He was with someone else…’

‘I went to confess my feelings for him, and he was with someone else…’

Tooru ranted off the worst curses he knew (which weren't that many), while he therapeutically kicked the first thing within reach – his suitcase – and then he marched over and threw himself down on the hotel bed like a wry child throwing a tantrum, crying into his pillow as he damned himself and his perpetually stupidity to the far end of a field.

It was, after all, far from the first time things had played out like this.

Next Chapter

Please leave a comment and make me happy~ ヽ(*´ω`)ノ゚ ♥

So, this is only the introduction to this story (the first real chapter is the next one)~ ☆

Just a small note:
The legal age of consent in Japan is 13 years of age. Now, the guy in Wataru’s bed might seem to be no more than fifteen years old to Tooru (who isn't exactly an objective eyewitness), but to me he’s at least sixteen years old, which is the legal age of consent in my country… (・ω・`*)

Anyway, Wataru’s just so perfect I wanted to make him a little bit of a creep by sleeping with someone almost ten years younger than himself, barely more than a kid… xD ♥


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September 2013

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